What messages do we tell ourselves?

Many victims of abuse fall into a cycle of self abuse. It often begins with negative self talk. Saying things like: you are so stupid, you are so fat, so ugly, you are such a failure…..and the list goes on and on. Perhaps your self talk isn’t as blatant or obvious as these messages but most victims speak similar messages to themselves every day.

Not only do these negative messages reinforce low self esteem but they are actually much more dangerous than that.

When we listen to these messages we actually begin to perform the very words we are speaking. We perform in accordance with how we think we will perform.

Scripture talks about the words we speak as having life….do we speak words of life or death over ourselves and over others.

Often when you look at a victims negative self talk it doesn’t take long to see why many victims find themselves failing at relationships, tasks or goals.

I came to this realization in my own life several years ago and made the decision to undertake a life time quest to choose life…. to speak words of life, words that offered positive self talk, not only to myself but to others as well.

I made the decision to immediately and forever cease talking to myself in negative terms….replacing the negative self talk with positive self talk. With the Lord’s help I daily must choose to reframe my self image, to no longer see myself in negative terms……and it’s a daily choice.

Some days I stumble back into the pit of negative self talk, some days the battle seems fierce. It’s sometimes a struggle to cut myself some slack and realize that I am not perfect, that I don’t have to perform or strive for God’s love and acceptance. Some days the battle is intense, it’s is all to easy to give in to the subtle voice of the enemy that would have me believing his lies.  

When I recognize what is happening I then must choose to go to my Heavenly Father and repent, asking that He would once again give me eyes to see myself as He sees me…to walk in my identity as a daughter of the Most High God….

I’d like to take some time and explore this whole area of negative self talk and what I have learned, and am still learning in this journey….


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