I came across this poem the other day and it really spoke to me and where I am at right now. If you’ve read The Wounded Heart by Dr. Dan Allender you’ll know what I am talking about when I mention the different styles of relating. When I am hurting due to circumstances that I feel are beyond my control I often revert to the tough girl and her way of relating, which is to put up a thick, impenetrable wall. Recently due to circumstances in my life I found my heart was becoming hard again. Upon reflection I realized it was to protect my heart, a way to protect myself. It really is nothing less than other-centered contempt.
When I feel things are out of my control I resort to the tough girl…be strong, show no tears or emotions, harden my heart….become the strong woman…I view my longings as sloppy and weak…..not wanting to be needy…..yet, in doing so I lose something of myself.
How do I become a woman of strength yet still remain tender. In 2 Corinthians 12:10(The Message) Paul talks about the grace of Christ being enough…all we need…the weaker I get, the stronger I become. Again in Scripture we find that He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint. Our strength comes from God’s grace…..once again I am learning that the Kingdom of God is a paradox. I am learning the difference between being a strong woman versus being a woman of strength….and there is a difference…I will come back to this from time to time and share more of my journey in learning this.
I would love to hear your views and heart on this subject…how do you see strength in a woman….what does it look like to you…how would you define it?
A strong woman works out every day to keep her body in shape…
but a woman of strength kneels in prayer to keep her soul in shape…
A strong woman isn’t afraid of anything…
but a woman of strength shows courage in the midst of her fear…
A strong woman won’t let anyone get the best of her…
but a woman of strength gives the best of her to everyone…
A strong woman makes mistakes and avoids the same in the future…
but a woman of strength realizes life’s mistakes can also be God’s blessings and capitalizes on them…
A strong woman walks sure footedly…
but a woman of strength knows God will catch her when she falls…
A strong woman wears the look of confidence on her face…
but a woman of strength wears grace…
A strong woman has faith that she is strong enough for the journey…
but a woman of strength has faith that it is in the journey that she will become strong
Copyright © 2005 Dee Cheeks
Tears in a Bottle 
Love this poem…really says it all. Perfectionism falls somewhere in this and once I let it go It can be so freeing. We think of being strong as freeing ourselves from others when really showing our weakness and excepting it is what totally frees us from outselves.
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I feel that God gives us the strenth to survive. First we have to nourish our minds spiritually, and everything else will fall in place. God does not give us more than we can handle…
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Well said Adele!!
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I Love It….. I had to share with my other female family members and friends because the point of it all is that when we know Christ and HE is the head of our life then HE is also our strength and our protector.
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WOW!!!
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Thanks so much for this poetic piece! It has blessed me so, I want to place it in as a “gift bag” stuffer at our women meetings, youth meetings, outreach efforts. Every woman & lil lady needs one of these! much love, Bumblebee
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One of my favorite poems, there is definitely a big difference.
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This is a blessing to me… and I will print it and read it from time to time to continue to remind myself that God is truly in control. He love me.. and I will bless Him at all times, His praises will continue to be in my mouth.
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This poem is ultimately Beautiful, & gives me Strength!!! Thanking You for the post!!
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Wow, talk about reaching you at your time of need.I am always told i am too sensative,but i have realized i am this way because thats the way god made me.i will not change or control me to suit you. Love me or not your choice .I love me and thats what counts the most.
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Well said
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Imagine my surprise in coming here today to find so many responses…thank you for your kind words each of you.
May God continue to walk close to each of you, His precious daughters, as you journey with Him and find your strength and peace in Him!!!
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This really hit home. Thanks for sharing. 🙂
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“I would love to hear your views and heart on this subject…how do you see strength in a woman….what does it look like to you…how would you define it?”
When I gathered with my girlfriends to explain the news story they were hearing about my husband’s affair, I wept all the way through the explanation. And also through telling them how I planned to respond to it. I don’t know why, but I knew from the first moment after learning of his infidelity that I would stay with him. It was unshakable and certain knowledge AND it made me feel so weak. When I voiced this out loud, my trusted, long-time friends told me that just the opposite was true. That staying and continuing to love was a show of strength, and not at all one of weakness. I didn’t believe that until I heard them say it, and then it rang true. After actually doing the staying, I see now how that took every ounce of my strength, strength I didn’t even know I had.
I define strength in a woman with the stories each tells. When we find a way to survive what feels like we never will, and then we turn back around and help the next one in line by telling the tale, we’re exposing our strength and then giving it away, to the woman that needs it next.
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Strength for me is allowing your weaknesses to show. It is being vulnerable and opening yourself up to being hurt. The strength to turn the other cheek. It is also the strength to move forward no matter your pain. Sounds awful doesn’t it? However it really isn’t. Strangely my father taught me that this kind of strength can be a total shock to others. It can change their lives also and make the world a better place.
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